PerZonal Pensieve! :)

Feb frenzy !

2012-02-15T22:11:00.001+03:00

I come here again to rant.

The past 2 months have been tiring. Just tiring. With all these PG exams. Realized the true competition of Medical Entrance only now. Two more exams to go. But I have completely lost hope now. Maybe I might not clear this time. Maybe I might never write these exams again. Don't know. I donot know when did the optimist me become a completely pessimist me .

There is something I have been hoping for. Dreaming for. Wishing for. Praying for. I donot know when I started doing so. I donot know when my heart started feeling so.

But I trust the Divine Decree. Whatsoever it is. It is the 6th pillar of Iman - To believe in fate, good or evil.

My Rabb knows me better than I do myself. His Plan for me is anyday better than my lowly desires and wishes. Thawakalthu-ala- Allah ! :)

Smile !

2012-01-17T20:00:00.001+03:00

Sometimes in life we feel so blue,
but someone somewhere is not happy as you.somewhere far at the border when a soldier sleeps,
missing his loved ones he silently weeps.
somewhere a mother painfully sighs coz,
her new born baby didnt open her eyes.
somewhere a poor dad silently cries,
when he sees his son begging for a bowl of rice.
somewhere in an orphanage a little girl is sad,
when she misses her mom and dad.
So at times a reason to smile you may not have any,
say to yourself that you are happier than many.
'cause life is beautiful and its not always blue,
and someone somewhere is not as happy as you. :-)

-Unknown

Jan-o-mania

2012-01-16T18:06:00.001+03:00

This post is basically written so that blog doesnt go empty in the first month of 2012 itself. And maybe another one of those venting episodes !

Just realized it has been 4 years since I started blogging, though I aint a frequent blogger. I like having my own space on web-o-sphere. And yes I hardly let any one I know in real life, know about the blog.

Here, I am back in the same place where I spent 5 years of my life, preparing for my post- graduate entrance exams. One down. 6 more exams to go. Insha'allah. I wonder how will I fare in them.

For a long time , I was confused whether I really wanted to do MDS or not,considering the fact ,I really didnt have the strength in me to stay again for 3 more years without anyone around ,so far away from my dear family.. Then when I finally realized I wanted to do and started preparing for the exams, maybe ,it was just a lil bit late. Hmm.. Dono. Anyways trying my level best now, Insha'allah! I really do pray and hope I get in through and get a seat of my choice in a city I can live by.

I waited for a long time for some door to open up for me. I waited for some signs from Lord. Nothing did. Alhamdulilah for it, cos then I finally understood ,I cannot keep expecting life to happen. I have to make it happen for myself, all by myself. We have to do our part & then leave the rest to Lord. Preparing for PG is one of the first steps in it. Insha'allah.

A few months back, at home, seeing my agonizing confused state ,my mom adviced me, 'go pray Salaathul Isthikhara. Ask Allah for guidance. He knows your troubles' . And seriously , I supposed it changed my outlook a whole lot. I had read/studied about Salathul Isthikhara a lot. But never really prayed until then. I used to think it was only for decisions related to marriage or so. I was wrong. I understand now, it is for any decision in regards. To ask Allah to bless us with something which is good for us in our Deen, our livelihood, our affairs, both in this world and in the Hereafter and also for us to be pleased and happy with the blessing. I would suggest the same ,to anyone going through indecisive or confusive stages of their life. I only wished I had prayed earlier.

There is none who knows us better than Allah Subhanahu Wa'Tala'.

Besides, a close friend of mine got 'nikkah-ed' . Couldn't be there for the function cos of the so called exams. Felt really low cos we grew up together, had our crazy girl's dreams together, and she is one of the only two people whom I had promised (since childhood) that I would be there for her big day, but I couldn't ! Insha'allah hoping to be there for the reception. May Allah Almighty bless you with the best in this world & the Hereafter Akhira. May your days ahead be blessed with joy, love & happiness and may it erase all those dark, depressing days, you had gone through. May you both remain under God's protection always & May He make this union a reason for you both to come closer to Him.

Before I vent, any more of my boring thoughts, I really need to stop, I suppose :D

'O overturner of hearts, make my heart firm in your religion'

Ya Rabb, make me among the company of the righteous .
Ya Rabb, make me one of your slaves who is always pleased and happy with Your Decree.

MCD- 9

2011-11-25T00:18:00.000+03:00

College Auditorium

Sept 20, 2011 - Graduation day

Graduation from a student to a doctor...with all its uncertainty ,

"Am I really ready to handle the challenges? "

"Will I live upto the expectation of the two initials before my name?"

"Will I be successful in my career?" and a million questions.....

Ever since I first witnessed the graduation Day program of my super seniors when I was in 1st year, have been eagerly waiting for my BIG DAY and Alhamdulilah it truly was a fantabulous day !

Hippocratic Oath

Like I updated on my personal profile :
"Insha'allah,Less than 12 hours to go for my Graduation Day - The first big event of my life ! Dono what I feel now ! May everything go good for each & everyone of us !! =)"
That was my un-explainable emotion the day before the function.

Getting Ready. Saree Troubles. Smiles. Photo Shoot. The graduation gown. Graduation March.Lighted Candles.Seating on our designated seats. Rising up to take The Hippocratic Oath. Changing the Tassel from left to right.Jubilation. Being called on stage for finally receiving my Bachelor of Dental Surgery Award. Being called on stage twice again for topping in two final year subjects. Speaking on behalf of the Outgoing Interns . Throwing the Cap in unison. Congratulatory messages. Laughter. Happiness. Happiness. Hapiness.

It truly was the most ''proudest'' day of my life , till date. Receiving the Degree in front of my two dearest people , who flew in all the way from Doha to Bangalore just for the occasion - My loving parents. My Biggest Doors to Jannah. I hope I did make you people proud ! :)

To all my dearest classmates, whom I have spent 5 years of my life growing up with, I will miss each and everyone of you ! You have taught me in ways more than anyone else. For a girl who grew up in the Arabian Gulf and oblivious of the bigger world, you people truly enriched me with experiences and memories, I otherwise wouldn't have . I came to know about the different festivals , the various cuisine in different parts of India , even our varied response to a particular situation. Kite flying festival - Uttarayan, Bihu , Navratri, Holi, Dhokla, Rasgulla even Pani Puri - The different names I had read in my geography text only until I came to Bangalore. I truly did experience a cultural diaspora among st you guys.

Class of 2011

I repeat the same words from my graduation speech.... " to a childhood friend who was always there, to a sibling who was never too busy , to a teacher who believed in our potential " Yes ! I have a million people to say my thanks and gratitude to ! :) ( a different blog post , I suppose ! )

I wonder what tomorrow holds for me. But I leave it to my Rabb. He has blessed me every single minute until now, even more than I deserved. So then how can I not trust HIM - Al Wadud - The Loving

.....and as the name of our event suggested, (UDGAMA 2011- The Rising star )
May we all rise to reach the pinnacle of glory in our personal, professional and spiritual life !

Heaven lies at her feet.

2011-11-23T13:18:00.001+03:00

Dua of a Single Muslimah =)

2011-11-20T23:10:00.001+03:00

"Ya Rabb, bless me with a spouse who is the coolness of my eyes in this life & helps me to attain Jannathul-firdaus-al'alaa in the next "

Ameen

MCD- 8

2011-11-19T00:00:00.000+03:00

For the innumerable people I have met during the course of my college years :

In course of time,innumerable people are gonna cross our path..some of them we end up being close to..some expand our horizon of thoughts..some are there for just a season..some break our hearts...with some we are our absolute best...some help us in revealing to ourselves,our-not-so-good-side...with some it is just gonna be a smile-while-we-cross-the-corridors-relationship...some, just another face on the street...but with every person,we are gonna polish a facet of our character, learn a new way of handling with situations, in short, every person on our way leaves their footprints on our hearts,in some way or the other!

MCD- 7

2011-11-18T23:25:00.001+03:00

I had updated this on twitter on May 28,2011. Feel it deserves a sure shot blog mention ! :)

There are many people to whom I shud say my thanks to as I head towards the final few months of college (Insha'allah).One sure is Ish Aunty & her family for the innumerable help done to me during my 5 years of college. That is one relationship in Blore that I am sure grateful for.Alhamdulilah.

'Supporting me left & right when my 2nd year results got withheld & then again sharing my happiness,when the results came & I topped,alhamdulilah.Consoling me when my cash got stolen or when I got robbed or how can I forget ,the countless times she made food for me during Ramadan,both Suhoor & Ifthar.Making sure everyone around was 'quiet' just because I was studying & motivating me all the time I was down.There were many times I missed Umma terribly & I wud go talk to her & somewhere I wud just feel alright.'

Thankyou for everything u have done for me.Thankyou for trusting me wid everything.Thank you for always making sure that I dint spend my Eid alone & that I wasnt lonely.Thankyou for considering me as a child of yours ! :)

Monu,u r really one of the closest friends I had in college & the bestest roomie ever.I miss our talking till late nite/serials-on-colours & other tv shows/ girl craziness/& everything else I shared wid u !

Blessed Lands, Indeed !

2011-10-30T21:21:00.000+03:00

It was the winter of 1997. I was in 4 th grade. My family decided to go for Umrah. Excitement creeps my body since it is the first time that I am going to see the ''Ka'bah" and to the Holy City of Makkah. More excitement for me as we are travelling with one of my best friend's (FF) family !!

To this December, It has been 14 years since that journey.....

My heart yearns to go back to the Holy Land...

to taste the feeling of Peace when we first set our eyes on the Ka'bah...

to circumambulate 7 times around the Ka'bah & to ask for forgiveness from AL Ghaffar ...

to kiss the Hajar Al Aswad and to remember I am touching the same spot as was touched by our Beloved Prophet SAW ...

to cry to my Lord of my innermost fears of which only He knows...

to say my Salaah in the Masjid al Haram and know that is equivalent to a 100 000 prayers and to feel the Oneness of The Ummah ...

to feel my forehead, while in Sujood, on the cold slab in the Courtyard of Mosque in Makkah...

to stand near the Maqam Ibrahim and pray the 2 Rakah's and remember the story of Prophet Ibrahim AS as he built the first place of Worship on earth ...

to perform Saee' along the Mountains of Safa & Marwah and to remember the story of a mother's ( Haajar) franatic search of water for her son ( Ismaeel AS) ...

to drink the blessed water of ZamZam and feel its coolness trickle down my throat ...

to see the Jabal Al-Noor where the first words of ''Iqra' " were revealed and to remind myself to just read more...

to hear the beautiful recitation of Qur'an by Sheikh Sudais, Sheikh Shuraim and other Imam(s) of the Holy Mosque...

to visit our Beloved Prophet's SAW Mosque and to feel , I am in the same place, same spot, where once long ago, Prophet SAW lived...

to pray 2 Raka'hs in Ar Rawda in the Prophet's Mosque...

to feel the coolness of the morning breeze as I walk in the blessed town of Madinah after Fajr Salaah...

Ya Rabb, help me to return back to the blessed lands soon - Ameen!

I look in to myself....

2011-10-28T20:59:00.001+03:00

I look in to myself...the time wasted without Your rememberance
You know, still
You choose to bless me with a little more 'time' to redeem myself !

I look in to myself...the temper tantrums
You know, still
You choose to bless me with people who will stay inspite !

I look in to myself...the dark spots on my heart,
You know, still,
You choose to bless me with people to love!

I look in to myself...the prayer said in haste
You know, still
You choose to bless me with answer to my duas !

I look in to myself...shame and regret on my innumerable sins
You know, stil
You choose to bless me with 'veil' of my sins !

I look in to myself...bickering about the food on the table
You know,still
You choose to bless me with protection from poverty & hunger !

I look in to myself....impatience when pain strikes
You know, still
You choose to bless me with good health otherwise !

I look in to myself.....complaints when things go wrong
You know, still
You choose to bless me with 'beautiful endings' !

I look in to myself...the laziness to achieve my targets
You know, still
You choose to bless me with intellect and curiosity!

I look in to myself...all I can find is the innumerable mistakes I have done, day in & day out
You know, still
You choose to bless me with your infinite blessings !

Blessings, most often, which I overlook...
Blessings, which sometimes, others are yearning for..
Blessings, which I take for granted.

Alhamdulilah! Alhamdulilah! Alhamdulilah!

Ya Rabb, make me of Your slaves who remember You every minute.
Ya Rabb, make me of Your slaves who Praise You often.
Ya Rabb, help me in control of my Nafs.
Ya Rabb, forgive me for my innumerable sins.
Ya Rabb, make me among the pious.
Ya Rabb, help me be in the company of the righteous.
Ya Rabb, make my restless heart to be at peace !

Ya Rabb, protect me from the blazing Fire !
Ya Rabb, place me among the people who enter Your Jannah !

Pearls from our Beloved Prophet SAW - Hadith

2011-10-27T19:23:00.000+03:00

A raging war ...Unexplained emotions...Indecisiveness...Confusion...

....& I came across this

Abu al-‘Abbas ‘Abdullah bin ‘Abbas, radiyallahu anhuma, reported: One day I was behind the

Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, and he said to me:

"O young man, I shall teach you some words [of advice] : Be mindful of Allah, and Allah will

protect you. Be mindful of Allah, and you will find Him in front of you. If you (have need to) ask,

ask of Allah; and if you seek help, seek help from Allah.

Know that even if the Nation (or the whole community) were to gather together to benefit you with

something, they would not benefit you with anything except that which Allah has already recorded

for you, and that if they gather together to harm you with something, they would not be able to

harm you with anything except that which Allah has already recorded against you.

The pens have been lifted and the pages have dried."

[Al-Tirmidhi relates this and says: It is a good, genuine Hadith]

In a version other than that of al-Tirmidhi it reads:

"..Be mindful of Allah, you will find Him before you. Get to know Allah in prosperity and He will

know you in adversity. Know that what has passed you by was not going to befall you; and that

what has befallen you was not going to pass you by. And know that victory comes with patience,

relief with affliction, and ease with hardship."

May it help some one like it helped me ! :)

MCD - 6

2011-10-24T14:32:00.001+03:00

It was July 2009

The University examination of Third year season.....

It was the first time we were having clinical examination (since first two years are mostly pre-clinical years!) - meaning we would be graded for the examination from the way we dealt with the patient,case history , so forth & so on..

Subject of Preventive & Community Dentistry. Nerve wracking times. Its the clinical viva time for me..made a whole lot of mistakes !!! The only thing I remember the Professor/ Head of Department saying to me was : "You will never become a good professional" and my already tainted confidence level became negative 100 maybe !!!!!

(I donot know why we often forget the innumerable praises others load on us but often takes with us that one negative ,sarcastic comment and most often never heal from that!! )

Let me frankly say, I hated that particular professor all through my clinical years. I literally hated going for any community related work if he was in charge. I always felt he too had the same feeling of hatred towards me :D :D ( I agree, childish !)

Fast forward, Sept 2011. Graduation Day. Besides the regular momento,scroll etc , I get called on stage for the Subject Topper Award in (same subject!!) Preventive & Community Dentistry and I had to receive the award from the very same Professor !!!!!

Somewhere along the line , that one statement had always been a source of motivation for me, though it has always been to prove him wrong. But nevertheless it became an inspiration to work harder!

So then , motivation can, at times, come from sarcastic comments too, isn't it ?

..and thinking of it now, I no longer have that feeling of hatred towards him anymore!!!

..confused !!

2011-10-20T12:06:00.001+03:00

I always live according to other's views..so that others donot get hurt.

I never try to get what I want...it is always what others want.

Does that make me a big coward who cannot stand up for her own wants & needs ?

Or Does that make me some super sacrificing person who is most often always taken advantage of ?

MCD 5

2011-08-13T21:01:00.000+03:00

I realized all my stories are being too depressing. Completely opposite of the person I am .

So here goes, some happy times.

It was Sept 21, 2006

A month after I came down to bangalore. Some of my old school freinds planned to go for an outing to Wonder-la ( Water theme park), around 9 of us.

That was the first time I was goin out on a full-fledged trip with just friends & no family.

Had an amazing time & in a way helped in dispelling the home sickness feeling. Today all the 9 of us are in different places, some are abroad doing their master's, some are working, rest I donot know...I have lost touch with almost all of them except one or two...

Whichever position of life they are in now, I hope & pray that they are forever blessed by Lord's bountiful blessings...

.....For the memories of that one day we spent in the waters & laughed with no care in the world !

From the Flickr album by Chitrasudar

MCD 4

2011-08-13T10:05:00.001+03:00

It was the April of 2007.

I was close to her.Pretty close to her...she heard my every conversation on phone, she saw my every mood, she knew about all my close friends from school... 'She' was my room mate.

.... & then my money started getting stolen. Little by little, initially & then later to bigger amounts.

Time & again, all the evidences pointed to her. But I was too scared & hurt to confront her. Initially did not let my parents or friends know about it.

I could never confront her directly, neither did she ever accept the fact. She always said she was misunderstood. I doubted myself in even having accusing thoughts about her. I still donot know what the truth is. Or ever I will get answers to all the lies she said me.

It was January of 2009.

After having a long day , finishing my pending Oral Pathology Project, was walking back to my hostel from my friends. It became late , almost 9 in the night. I was carrying my laptop bag +college bag (which resembles a laptop bag too ) on my either shoulders. Suddenly a bike slowed down & snatched my college bag ( I presume supposing it to be the laptop bag ) . For a minute there, I did not know how to react. By the time, I regained my senses, the bike had taken a good head start. Though some of the friends who saw the incident went behind the robbers, they could not get hold of him. I never got my bag back. Nothing valuable , there was, except for my Oral Path Project which I had to start & complete all over again in a gap of 2 days.

The second incident never left its mark on me much, besides to be careful while I walk in the night.

But the first incident made an imprint on me forever...

I realized the people who can stab you worst are the ones whom are you most close to. As for the harsh words/actions of unknown people whom you meet on life's ways, it can never really impinge !

Be careful before you open your heart to some one !

MCD 3

2011-08-07T21:31:00.000+03:00

Every Monday of First year ,we had a viva on Dental Materials, which means our Sundays used to go mostly preparing for it.

The topic was 'Dental Cements' in which we gotta know every minute detail of every cement we use in dental practice like compressive strength, tensile strength, yield strength ,blah blah (I think Civil Engineers can understand what I am talking about! )

One particular Monday & my viva did not go well.The lecturer handling it ,Dr. S gave me a 'lecture; in fact :
"I know you have done well in school, but you are taking college a little too lightly. The next 4 years can make your or break you. Finish your course, learn your work well , go back home & establish yourself "

Over the course of my non-clinical & clinical years , Dr. S ended up becoming one of my favorite Professors & a Dentist I look up to.

Even today, though he is no longer associated with our college, I know , if I have a doubt regarding any aspect of my field, I can sure ring him up !

Salute , Sir !

MCD 2

2011-08-06T21:31:00.001+03:00

The second year of college was pretty tough for me. I was handled by some Professors who put into my face bluntly that I was incapable of studying or doing those Pre-clinical exercises.

Final two months came by.Worked with all my heart and head. Was in a mad rage to prove those people who belittled me. Prayed as much as I could.

Exam went good, but finally when the results, the results of 2 other classmates and mine were withheld at the University. Initially ,as usual, I blamed myself, thought I had written the Roll No. in the OMR sheets wrong. Later came to know it was a technical error at the Univ.

It was Ramadan when all this hungama happened. Prayed with so much of anguish & desperation, in a way I have never prayed before ( Now Looking at it ,it seems too silly ,but then I thought that was the end of the world :D )

Finally a week later, my results came. I topped, surprisingly. Alhamdulilah.

All praise to Lord Almighty.

.....& I learnt, a prayer of a fasting person doesn't go unanswered !

My College Days 1

2011-08-06T11:07:00.001+03:00

I just have a few more days in college. Planning to write those small things I learnt , besides the actual degree...

It was August 15, 2006. Dad dropped me at the new hostel. I had a huge and horrid shock seeing my new abode(Unhygienic).Finally settled on the new place still, cos it was embedded in to my head that things are not going to be as cosy as it was in Doha, by my mom and sis.I thought this was part of being 'not cosy'

A whole lot of girls from different part of India were there in the hostel...from Assam, Delhi, Rajasthan, Gujarat, Bihar....They had joined a few days earlier and so by then had jelled up!

....& then I realized everyone around was speaking Hindi, a language which I totally abhorred, having to learn in school cos I could never really understand it then.Too much of talk, and laughter .....& I couldn't be a part of it. Having grown up in a school where I had the same set of friends for 12 years, I was finding it real hard.

Little did I know then ,it was the begining of a long journey which taught me lots....

........to adjust with people from different places speaking different languages with different attitudes having different belief!

P.A.T.I.E.N.C.E

2011-07-25T21:24:00.001+03:00

Patience.......He hears every prayer.

Patience.......He answers every prayer at the time best for it.

Patience.......He has seen every tear & fear.

Patience.......He knows what's best for us, & we may not know.

Patience........for 'He does not burden a soul beyond its scope'

Patience........for He afflicts trials on whom He loves.

Patience.......for the end will be good,if it's not,it isn't the end yet.

Patience.......for reasons will be revealed in course of time.

Patience.......the dots can be connected only backwards.

Patience........for with ' Difficulty comes relief'

Patience........for perfection-of-life is not an aspect of Dunyah,but of Jannah.

Patience........for with every pain, He forgives a sin.

Patience........for our ultimate aim should not be temporary pleasures.

Patience........for our goal should be everlasting happiness of Jannah.

Patience........for adversities make us to be humble before Him.

Patience.........for difficulties help us to remember Him often.

Patience........for our trials are minute compared to the trials faced by our beloved Prophet Muhammad SAW

Patience......... Patience .....Patience

O you who believe! Seek assistance through patience and prayer; surely Allah is with the patient.(2 : 153)

Sky is the limit!

2011-06-16T21:23:00.002+03:00

Growing up I had a million dream & one,(time n again , like I have written on my blog) was to work with WHO or UNICEF.To help impoverished children and kids affected by war .

I donot know when it came to my head...but I remember seeing a footage on TV ( Al Jazeera or QTV, don't remember) as a 12 year old, about the 12 year old Palestinian Child , Muhammad Al Durrah, who was shot dead during clashes between Israeli soldiers & Palestinian security officials.The boy was killed while his father tried to save his precious child"s life hiding behind a concrete cylinder.Losing a child is difficult for any parent. Imagine ,the anguish of the father who lost his child in front of his own eyes!?

Those images lingered on my mind....& that's when , I decided , I would do something when "I grow up " (First mistake!)

I was a Math Lover (modestly to say - a Math topper too, Alhamdulilah) in school. Yet I choose the Medical profession for fulfilling my above said dream. I thought it was only medical professionals who could do the ground work of "helping others" ( Second mistake!). Over time, I realized most of the volunteer work is done by non-medical volunteers in any Organization.

But here ,I am ,3 months ( Insha'Allah) away from graduating from Dental School & yet I have not done anything about fulfilling my dream. I am in the "mad race" to prepare for my Post Graduation Entrance Examinations & also to settle down. ( Third Mistake!)

All during my school years in Qatar, I thought , I would start with Volunteer work after I come back to India for college. Yet here , I am, with no absolute record of any work in the past 5 years in India ( Besides the free Dental Camp / Polio Camps from college)

Now , I am waiting for the next phase of my life to happen so I can start with the "work". Putting it off, again ! :(

I am the kind of person who follows every rule to the dot, who makes sure a hundred times that others aren't hurt before I make a decision,who doesn't utter a word against,if it is spoken by someone elder to me.

Now , I want to break free from all this. I want to live my dreams. I know, I am going to face quite a lot of hardship with the same... But, Insha'Allah. I believe

I ask myself, "What is the point of having a dream,if you are not willing to work for it?"

(PS : This post is written just to motivate myself or maybe even remind myself ,later, that once upon a time I had a dream so... )

...& One day, Insha'allah!

2011-05-08T21:30:00.001+03:00

Haven't you noticed,many a times,we think when we get that perfect score on a test,get the latest gadget,be back with our family, or meet our better half,that the sorrow will fade away, that we will become happy again?

But also haven't u seen, even when we 'procure' these worldly joys,a sorrows lingers somewhere,a melancholy strikes deep,quite often,unexplainable?

Check out the video & see if it explains atleast a little of the answers to the above questions.

A quiet evening,coffee & some dreams!

2011-05-07T21:30:00.002+03:00

...as the sun rays warms my heart!

Saying it with FLOWERS! :)

2011-05-07T16:38:00.002+03:00

(96:1).Read in the Name of your Lord Who has created you

Renew your Iman,everyday !


Smile,its charity too!

Lower your gaze

Don't despair,answers by HIM are given at its due time

.... & everything is under His watchful eye

Be soft in speech

Hear a happy news, Say, 'Masha'allah '

Find His signs in the nature around & say Subhana'allah

Lower your wings of Mercy to your parents

Show kindness to His creations & He will bestow his kindness on you

Remain Chaste & Pure

Haya (modesty) is a part of faith

Don't forget to remember Him always

ME !

2011-03-22T16:50:00.005+03:00

The twitter trending topic '100 facts about me' gave me this idea....

Sitting a lil bored in dept. & So thought would work upon this...

1. I am a Muslim . Trying my level best in practising my faith in all aspects.Insha'allah.

2. I have been wearing the hijab since I was 11/12 & I absolutely love wearing it.

3. I am 1988 born.

4. I was born in Mukkam,in the beautiful city of Calicut, Kerala.Though my POB records state it as 'veliankode'

5. I have lived in India only for around 9 years.First 4 years of life & last 5 years-college.

6. I have lived in Doha for 14 years.

7. I consider Doha ,more, 'home' than India.

8. I know Malayalam & English.Can speak broken Arabic,Hindi,Kannada & of late, Urdu (very little though)

9. I love reading. Absolutely.

10. I love studying about my Deen.

11. I absolutely adore my family. Mom,Dad & 3 siblings.

12. My dad is my role model.

13. My mom is my pillar.

14. My lil brother is my joy.

15. I am a student of 'Bachelor of Dental Surgery'.

16. All through my 12 grade, I said I would not take up Dentistry.But eventually I ended up taking it & have been quite happy with my decision,Alhamdulilah.

17. I am a horrible Procrastinator.

18. I get nervous & tensed quite easily.

19. My confidence level fluctuates like the lines on ECG

20. I used to love Math in school & still regret not continuing with it,atleast as a minor subject.(Though it aint possible with the Indian Education System)

21. The only reason why I wanted to be in the Medical field was bcos I wanted to work with WHO/UNICEF. Though I dono if these dreams will ever become true.

22. I have a few academic achievements to my credit. Alhamdulilah

23. I quite often make decisions with my family in mind :D

24. I donot know how to drive,still.

25. I love studying/getting to know new facts.

26. I love reading quotes.

27. I cannot stand lies.

28. I am terrified of misunderstanding ezp between loved ones.

29. Writing or jotting down helps me while I am depressed.

30. All my journey's are adventurous.

31. I come across as very quiet to people I dono much.Wrong view.

32. I am pretty shy :D

33. I am a nature freak.

34. I am a clealiness freak.

35. I hate it when some one litters the street.

36. I am scared of dogs,rats, actually almost all animals.

37. I love babies. I wanna be a Pediatric dentist.Insha'allah. If circumstances permit me.

38. If I am bored, I count. I count leaves,tubelights,chairs,just about anything.

39. Without reading newspaper (atleast the headlines) my day feels incomplete.

40. I love chocolates.

41. I love debating, in informal circles,I mean.

42. When I am upset, I become extremely quiet.

43. I like counselling/motivating people. (though I cannot work on myself)

44. I am stubborn+ persistent.

45. I am competitive.

46. I like getting involved in community/Islamic activities. (Very less after coming to college,though )

47. I have to follow rules. However dumb they are!

48. My belief in friendship is slowly fading.

49. The people whom I called ' Best friends' when I was 10, they are still my best friends.

50. I believe in 'arranged marriages' or atleast 'love cum arranged'. I donot think good of people who hurt their parents & leave home. Period !

51. Until 2 years back,I dint even know how to make omlettes. Now have learnt a little bit of cooking,still very little. Cooking Non veg - not yet done.

52. I have been robbed once & still a chill passes through my spine, if a bike or car slows down by my side,while I walk on the street.

53. I lived a sheltered life until 18 & used to think smoke/drinks/drugs happens only in movies or among the very affluent.

54. Before I came to Blore, a friend remarked, 'Most of the people are on drugs there!' & the first time I came here, I was searching for white satchet (like in movies) in every random person's hand! :D

55. Small things make me happy. Even a stranger's smile.

56. I can cry quite easily, especially if I see a close one in tears.

57. I dream /fantasize a lot. I can make a complete sequence of events in my head.

58. I am not good in communcating my feelings,esp with my family.

59. Rash driving scares me.

60. I pull (gently) a strand of my hair while I am studying or thinking deeply.

61. I find it extremely hard to trust people, now.

62. I donot get close to people fast.

63. Fiery tempered people make me feel very uncomfortable (or frightened)

64. I fear failure.

65. I like being punctual.

66. I am a sleepaholic.

67. I am more attached to computer than T.V

68. I cannot understand the game of 'cricket' though many people tried explaining it to me.

69. My brother is a huge football fan & therefore he has passed a lil bit of his interest to me! :D

70. When I was a kid , I used to follow every tennis match & had a scrapbook of all famous tennis personalities.

71. I like solving puzzles,numerical patterns & sudoku.

72. Once upon a time I was hooked on MSN Messenger,then Orkut,& Facebook. All of their novelty has weaned off & I am presently addicted to Twitter.I wonder when I will get bored with it too.

73. Being in a culture like in Blore,has made me to learn & introspect more about the Deen, Alhamdulilah

74. The airports I have been to -Bangalore,Mumbai,Calicut,Muscat,Bahrain,Dubai & Doha.

75. Countries I have been to -only India,Qatar & Saudi Arabia

76. Slight breeze,a bright full moon nite,leaves rustling,quietness -makes me calm & happy.

77. I LOVE Rain. I go bonkers like a 5 year old.

78. Many people have said to me, ' U resemble some one I know' LOL

79. Morning tea or coffee is absolutely necessary for me.

80. In the family, there are- 1 teacher, 2 Engineers, 1 Engineer-in-the-making (Insha'allah) , 1 Engineer-aspirant (Insha'allah). I am the Odd one out.

81. Silence is an important aspect of my personality.It has its negative issues

82. I am trying to cut out 'Music' in my life.

83. As a child , I had prayed, that I should be the first one to die in the family bcoz I cannot deal with 'loss'. Now I learn that there is a Hadith which states that we should not long for death.

84. I feel glad when I see another Hijab-clad girl in campus. (Very few)

85. I have been protected from ragging/unnecessary talks & phone calls, after coming to college, I think, bcoz of the Hijab & the serious-persona it potrays. Alhamdulilah. In short, I learnt of the Power of Hijab after coming to college only. Alhamdulilah

86. I like surfing the net-Islamic sites,News, Youth Related, Health, Dentistry & social networks :D

87. I had promised myself that I would start studying 'Qur'an Tafseer' while during my internship year,but its not happening. I need motivation & help. Anyone?

88. I have a dream to go to Palestine.

89. My dad had worked in Nigeria & Libya, long before I was born. It was a childhood dream to visit the places,hearing his stories :)

90. Last time, I went to The Holy Cities of Makkah & Madinah was while I was in 4 th grade. I yearn to go there again,Insha'allah, someday soon.

91. I donot forget a mistake I made. In short, I donot forgive myself easily.

92. My favourite time of the day is Pre-Maghrib.

93. My favourite home-made food : Mom's biriyani

94. My favourite fast food : Pizza

95. My favourite dessert : Death-by-chocolate (Blore fame)

96. My happiest moment,recently : Final Year Result Day

97. I am confused about what to do immediately after I finish college this year.

98. When in college, I miss home dearly. My friends are used to hearing 'I wanna go home' from me.

99. Past 5 years in India ,I have visited Doha 13 times. (98 reinforced :D )

100. Writing this 100 facts helped me to look into areas I should improve myself & also remember my blessings! Alhamdulilah!

A witness to each other's LIFE..... !

2011-03-16T20:52:00.002+03:00

I am presently posted in Oral & Maxillofacial Surgery....ok my least favourite ! But ,Alhamdulilah, many instances & situations I have learnt from....

A bright Wednesday morning, HOD 's off day....& So we breathe a lil easy....It was just me & another co-intern present today.Rest two were on leave....

A man aged (around 30's) comes to the Dept. asking for Dr. A since his wife has to undergo an impaction surgery!The whole time,husband was talking & explaining the problem.Wife was pretty quite....

It dint strike me until my co-intern said me , " She is deaf & dumb".

Dental chair brings out the worst of anxiousness in any person.Then imagine being in such a situation & not being able to voice your fears.Such was her state.Yet her husband patiently waited with her,beside her dental chair,communicating back & forth with her & Dr.A (in sign languange) . Seeing the husband's devotion & care,I had a newfound respect for him!

They say younger people these days, donot know how to handle difficulties in relationships. They say 'divorce-is-the-answer-for-every-problem' for our generation.Why do they not look at couples like these & change their views!

My silent prayers......

& Yet again another patient comes in,around 60 years....She tells me quite innocently , " Novaaayithu illi' " Thakiss bedaa" " hallu Powder" meaning 'Its Paining here' ' dont remove' 'Teeth Powder'.... Its after a while it struck me 'by powder' she meant ,place a restoration,or in other words,just fill the cavity.She was quite anxious & dint want to remove her teeth.So I sent her to the Dept of Cons & Endo to get their opinion on whether the teeth can be saved or whether it should be extracted out! They send back a report saying the teeth cannot be saved since there was Grade II mobility along with furcation involvement.Which means the teeth has to undergo extraction.Her husband patiently explained to her the procedure & convinced her for the extraction.I was just writing the OP,taking the patient consent ,advicing her for preliminary investigations ,while I asked the medical history & the husband replies, 'She is having Parkinsonism & Schizoprenia since the past 8 years'.

Alhamdulilah,the case went fine & was treated by Dr. L.

I was at overwhelmed seeing the husband's love , knowing of his wife's mental health, yet his love surpassing all boundaries,not expecting anything back....

Today I saw a younge couple,in the beginning of their journey together ,knowing of each other's imperfections,yet accepting it & moving ahead...

An aged couple , who (might have) lived a happy togethersome life for the past (so many ) years & when a disease arose, sticking with each other through all odds....

They Ayah from the Holy Qur'an becomes more clear to me,
"And among His signs is this, He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in peace and tranquility with them,and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts) : Verily in that are signs for those who reflect" ( 30:21)
(A beautiful explanation of the above verse is given in Tafhimul Quran-can access at www.englishtafsir.com)

Yes,in the love between spouses,there indeed is a sign of the Lord above! or else how can we explain the love & understanding between two people who usually meet around 20's or 30's ( or earlier or later) ,who aren't related by blood or relation to be such strong supporters of each other until either breathes their last!

"...Bind two strangers bought up in different enviroments so intimately together that the two remained attached to each other through every thich & thin of life..." ( From Tafhimul Qur'an )
If you can feel your 5 senses,don't forget to say , ' Alhamdulilah' cos there are many who cannot......

If u can make coherent conversations & perceive things as it is,don't forget to say , ' Alhamdulilah' cos there are many who cannot...

If u have a spouse who will be there by your side,no matter what,don't forget to say , 'Alhamdulilah ' cos there are many who are not blessed so...

TRUST..........!

2011-03-13T17:20:00.001+03:00

A sailor was stuck in an island where he was the only survivor.
He made a hut for his shelter. He was waiting for someone to help, but no one came. He stored food in the hut for his survival, but one day, the hut burnt to ashes and nothng was left of it.
He was so angry,he said,"God, why have you done this to me??"

The next morning rescuers came. Sailor asked,"How did you know that I am here?"
They replied..
"V saw a smoke signal!"

Trust ALLAH..
His plans are always greater than ours...! :-)

(A forward msg I received recently & wish to share! =) )

22 as it was....

2011-03-07T20:08:00.005+03:00

24 hours before I turn 23,I want to look back at the wonderful year it has been,Alhamdulilah !

If anyone asks me what is it that I remember most of the last year,it was those final few months before the final exam.The sheer pressure...pure stress...killing tension! I donot expect anyone who hasn't gone through it to understand it...& To all those who feel I am making it sound 'enormous', I am not. That's all I can say !

I feel a special bond with all my batchmates,coz we the ones who shared it together! A week before exam when IOPAR s had to be redone cos there was no signature in the records..drawing surgery diagrams 3 times all over again...doing inter maxillary fixation on a cast & the wire poking into the skin n the bleeding hands...waking each other up wid water,sms,& innumerable calls ....

To get up at 2 in the nite to mug up biomechanics or principles of tooth preparation or condylar fracture(read it as ortho,prostho or OS-papers we dint have a break in btween) to write an exam at 2 in the afternoon...I frankly donot remember how much of ZamZam & electrogyl I drank in those days,just to keep me awake....

Patient-hunting days before the clinical exam..Going to IlyazNagar slum at 6 in the morning & waking up patients (lol) so as to make sure that by sharp 9:00 AM,the patients are on our dental chair.....

But the pain of all the stress& tension washed away in a single moment...Sitting in my home in Kerala on an August evening,when I logged on to RGUHS site & saw the 7 'pass' written there (rather the 7 pass of 5 people)....I donot remember what I screamt out loudly to my dad who was reciting the Qur'an after his Maghrib prayers & my mom who was engaged in her After-Maghrib-Dhikr...All I remember was that,I was screaming on top of my lungs! Alhamdulilah. ...That is a moment that will be imprinted in my heart,mind & soul forever!!!Alhamdulilah....

Looking back through the year ,I have learnt quite a lot..spiritually,professionally & personally...

Going through some dark days of low,blow & despair,I have learnt simply just place ur Trust in Lord Above....To rely on Him completely...even when the whole world turns their back & you are crashing,He is there..At times when friends near you cannot see those tears or family miles away,feel your pain,HE is there....that's it..HE is there!Alhamdulilah...

Professional learning was my biggest achievement of the last year! alhamdulilah....The year I started learning the basics of all branches of dentistry...There is so much more to learn,insha'allah & I truly have miles to go....

A change in me,personally,is atleast starting, to conquer my fears.Though it is just the starting,nevetheless a starting......

Yet another lesson was from seeing death so close..2months later,I & rest of my classmates are still reeling under the shock & I think there will b a part of us,which will forever be...
From your loved ones,to the people who teach you ; from the lab assistant to the grocer whom you frequent ; from the chat friend miles away to the lil junior who looks up to you ; from the lil sibling who has seen you since the day he was born to the football mates wid whom u played unnumerable matches , our lives are so interconnected!!

I miss you,friends!I really do! May ur souls rest in peace!

At the cross-roads of life,I donot know where life is goin to take me after this year,whether this is going to be my final year of formal education or whether marital bliss (?) (Or is it marital responsibilites) is going to knock on my doors..I donot know...Anyways,Thawakalthu-ala-Allah !I know His ways are always for the BEST!

To all those people who made my life better in many ways & on many days....thankyou!!

To my mom & dad,siblings ezp my lil bro who is my lil sunshine in my small world,some real close friends (I aint naming u ppl,s'ppose u know! :) )

As for me,these final few months of my college...Only advice for myself,from ME (;D) : Take it easy,relax & enjoy! these days will not come back ever again!

Insha'allah,looking forward for 'the Graduation'....
Insha'allah,looking forward to taking 'the Hippocrates Oath'.....
Insha'allah,looking forward to that moment when I change the tassel from left to right...

Innocence Personified!

2011-01-27T07:39:00.001+03:00

My 3 year old cousin gets a dried twig .She moves away some soil,makes a place for planting the twig....

" & It will grow up ,give me lots and lots of mango.It will be very tasty.I will give you also"

A still ....

2011-01-24T10:25:00.002+03:00

Souls in search-either for the best in this world or for the best in the Hereafter!

MY WISH.....

2011-01-13T19:06:00.002+03:00

........for 2011 : A wish only I know :P

Insha'allah!! :)

In loving memory of.......

2011-01-06T17:17:00.003+03:00

Long ago,when I joined college my sis said to me,"We are not letting u go to bangalore jus for a mere medical degree,but for u ,to learn to live too"

I am slowly realizing....

In first year,we were just 60 odd people,from different states of India and even different countries of the world-Iran & Bhutan-to be precise!I loved telling I had 'international' classmates then.I wasn't in much touch wid SONAM then.Just a few smiles,'how are you s'.....but his humility always struck me!

1st year exams came and went.We were exposed to the pressure of our 1st university exams.First theory papers n then we had to go thru the practicals....On the day of Anatomy practical exam,he dint arrive though he had given the theory paper.After all the exams,we asked ,"why didnt u come for pracs?U wud have surely passed!!Shud have come and attempted it atleast!"
His sweet smile...."Dono,maybe..." "U shud have" "Anyways I'll write it next time......

Forever, Down-to-earth!

2nd Year -Cons & Prostho Pre-clinicals-Our first entrance to the dental activities!All the staff was very impressed with his "hand-skills"
There was a huge annual sports meet that year,the biggest conducted by our college.That is when we noticed how he becomes a lightning sprint with the football and what an agile athlete he was.I still remember screaming out loud "SONAM...SONAM...SONAM" " 2nd Years go on..."on a staff versus 2nd year football match...
There will be one more match before we leave college.It tears me to think that he wont be there for it.....

Forever,our Ronaldo..

3rd Year-We started with our clinical postings.Our first experiences in dealing with patients.Sonam was posted wit Shruti,Romil & Shwetha.I remember Shruti coming back and recounting all of his antics in departments and the fun times they had...

Forever,our simple boy!

Final year-It is the year in which we go through horrible deadlines & unimaginable stress.There was always some or other assignment or clinical work to be finished for the next day.We were always on our feet.But there was always one person who could be seen at peace & wid a soft smile on his lips...

Last January,running about trying to complete my CD work on time before I leave for home for my mid-sem break & a demaning patient over my head.....a night when I was trying to finish my work when I realized I had no wax sheets to complete my occlusal rims.OMG!! What am I gonna do!?! was my initial reaction...

I rang up everyone of my friends,with fingers crossed hoping that someone had an extra sheet lying about.I messaged all i cud think of....no positive response from any one...8:30 PM....9:00 PM...& i realized I had no other go..But to face the wrath of the patient for delaying his CD...I was in tears..I had booked my flight for the next day..& i had to finish my work before I go...I prayed...Pls find me some way!

At around 9 PM ,I get an sms from Sonam...
"Hey sorry Shahira for the late reply.I was out playing football.Just now I saw ur message.I have a couple of waxsheets here.I will surely give them to ya"

He was my God sent Angel that day!

When I replied I will come to campus to collect it..."No ways,dont be out so late.I ll come to ur place & give it.Not at all a problem"

On the day of Prostho exam.I jus realized my spirit lamp & blow torch weren't in a working condition.The only other person in the other batch whom I could ask a favour was Sonam...

Perio exam morning...my universal scaler was misplaced.Again the person who pitched for me was Sonam...

On the day of Cons exam,I was literally shy to ask of him for one more favour..GMT..and said sorry for troubling him so much...." It is a pleasure for me helping you"

Always kept other's needs before his..Could never say a NO to another person..

The innumerable times he boosted me up when I was down..."I know you have the caliber to deliver...just keep going...Good luck" Did I thank you enough?

When finally the final year results came,he unfortunately had 3 papers to go again..I send a FB msg stating that it is ok & everything will turn out to be fine next time ia...Next time never came...

His reply, "Nice to hear from you,Shahira..M doing great & m still at home..hope ur doing g8..Congragulation fren..n as for me..am not tat upset..everything happens for gud i guess..hehe..neways hope ur college is going well..will come soon..cya tkare"

Optimism was his middle name...

How ironical is the fact,he just attempted those 3 theory papers again & was about to go for the 3 pracs starting from 5 when tragedy struck....

Sonam....u always ended ur sms,conv with a take care...Why dint u take care of urself that fateful morning?..Why did u go for that fateful trip?

It is only after ur demise,that we realized that you are the only sunshine of a mother who lost her husband years back...

It is only after your demise ,that we came to know that u were send by Govt. of Bhutan to India..to study...to become a doctor...Did we take care of you enough?

You have touched innumerable lives in your short 23 years..forever left an imprint in our hearts...

Ur soft smile,ur gentle ways,ur humility...I need to learn from it!

I promise you,you will be remembered forever in our prayers...

I am sure,no new years will pass by for me ,without thinking of you...

Did i fail in my duty of letting you know of my Deen?

(Somewhere when times erases these simple memories...I hope this post will help me remember!)

..My pillars of LOVE!!

2010-12-15T11:20:00.001+03:00

Every time I come back home from college,on holidays,the subtle differences I see.....

Mom gobbling up more & more tablets...

Dad finding it hard to lift the luggage....

& I realize....

& It breaks my HEART!!!

Rabbirham'huma Kama Rabbayani' Sa'eera!!

How many of our blessings do we count?

2010-12-03T01:16:00.001+03:00

"Maashallah..not every one gets a chance to fulfill der dreams..ur among de chosen ones.."

Just a few days ago one of my school friends remarked while I was chatting with her online.....

It struck me then........

yes,indeed,I am blessed!!Here I am on the threshold of graduating from a dental school with another ten months (Insha'allah ) Maybe it is a blessing to have an amazing family support to further my education,when there are many 'dads' who donot allow their girls to be sent away from their homes or cities!Or yet again parents who want their kids to be degree-holders,but are financially weak to support them.I have both (Alhamdulilah) and still I have never considered it as a blessing!How ignorant could I be!?!

There are innumerable times I crib about being alone while I am sick,having to travel alone or having to face people who have nothing to say but against my religion or state or just about anything!

But maybe,

in being alone,while I am sick have given me the ability to take care of myself in any situation.......

in being alone,while I travel have given me the ability to enjoy solitude and tackle any situation with the best of my logic....

in being alone,while I face two-faced,three-faced etc beings have given me the ability to figure out,at times,silence is the Best!!

& Most of all,in being alone,I have realised the importance of appreciating companionship!!

How often we are so abuntantly blessed & yet we complain!?!

At times,we need a sentence or two like that,to knock some sense in to our perveted minds to see the larger picture and a different perspective!

Does evil eye really hit?

2010-12-01T12:41:00.000+03:00

We often hear of people saying "evil eye", " nazar "...I wanted to know its religious answers!!

I find....

Allah says in the Holy Qur'an, (113: 1-5)

Say: I seek refuge with the Lord of the dawn,

from the evil of everything He has created.

And from the evil of the darkness of night when it overspreads.

and from the evil of the blowers (men or women) into knots.

And from the evil of an envious one when he envies.

Things to do when you feel you are being hit by "hasad",

Hasad means that a person should feel unhappy at the better fortune, superiority or good quality that Allah has granted to another, and should wish that it should be taken away from the other person and given to him, or at least the other one should be deprived of it. However, hasad does not mean that a person should wish that he too should be blessed with the bounty that the other one has been blessed with.

Here, Allah's refuge has been sought from the evil of the jealous one when he feels jealous, and takes a practical step with word or deed to satisfy his heart. For until he takes a practical step, his being unhappy may by itself be bad but it is not an evil for the other person so that he may seek refuge from it.

When such an evil appears from a jealous person the best thing would be to seek Allah's refuge from it. Besides this, there are a few other things also which are helpful for obtaining immunity from the evil of the jealous person

First, that one should have trust in Allah and the faith that unless Allah so wills no one can harm him in any way.
Second, that one should have patience over what the jealous person says and does and should not start behaving impatiently so as to be degraded morally to the level of the jealous person.
Third, that one should in any case maintain dignity and practice piety even if the jealous person behaves frivolously, being fearless of God and shameless of the people.
Fourth, that one should free one's mind of every thought about the jealous person and should disregard him altogether, for making him a subject of one's thought is a prelude to being influenced by him.
Fifth, that one should do the jealous person a good turn as and when one can, not to speak of treating him evilly, no matter whether this good behavior mitigates his jealousy or not.
Sixth, that one should understand rightly and remain steadfast to the doctrine of Tauhid for the heart which enshrines Tauhid, cannot be affected by anyone else's fear except the fear of Allah.

( Taken from Tafhimul Quran by Sayyid 'Ala Maududi-english translation)

I came across a dua said by the Holy Prophet in regard to the same,

Ibn Abbas related a Hadiths, "The Holy Prophet (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to recite this invocation over Hadrat Husain & Hasan,
" I give you in the refuge of Allah's Blameless words,from every devil and troublesome thing ,and from every evil look" (Bukhari,Musnad Ahmad,Ibn Majah)

May The Almighty protect us all!

Lab pe aati he dua

2010-11-30T09:20:00.001+03:00

Melodious voice...Beautiful song

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

A detour or a straight road? :)

2010-11-24T21:30:00.002+03:00

In the cross-roads of life,that is the position I am in now!

After struggling 4 years with books,day & night,I realize,I need to go on
longer if I really wanna be in some 'position' & also maybe struggle again a year more with entrance books to struggle 3 more years!(Three times ,the word struggle ! :D)

I am going through what every Intern goes through-Uncertainity!

Is the whole lot of information I MUGGED UP gonna be a waste?

Am I gonna do my post graduation,If so in which branch of dentistry?

In which part of the world am I gonna settle down?India or the middle east or still farther?

Depending on the country depends my future study plans,so again,a whole lot of question marks!

How is my clinical practice going to be?

Entrance exams with the big E!

& many more sawaal

But....

One thing,life has taught me...
Whatever is decided by God is what is gonna happen
& eventually always it is the BEST!!

Just Trust in Lord-dad always tells us-& I realize its power!

Till Next,

Fly High! :)

Subhana'allah!!

2010-11-19T21:10:00.001+03:00

Out of all the 19 subjects I have,the one I feared the most and struggled the best was ANATOMY-First year subject!

Now am back to struggling with it....for Cedees.

Thats when I thought....

There are 206 bones,more than 650 muscles,31 bilaterally paired spinal nerves,45 miles of nerves,5 million hair on our body of which 100 000 are on our head....

Nerve impulse travel at the speed of 400 km/hr,heart beats around 100000 times per day,our blood is on a 60000 mile journey,25 million new cells are being produced every second....

One square inch of human skin contains 625 sweat glands...

There are 137 million light sensitive cells in the eye's retina and fluid that fills the eye is changed 15 times a day....

Just quoting a very few facts about the human body....

All this in one human being...

There are about 6.8 billion people on earth,alive that is....

so multiplying the above numbers by 6.8 billion..

Mind boggling,ain't it?

& All under the control of The Creator!The Highest Power!The Lord of the worlds!

Subhana'allah!

Such is His power! Subhana'allah!

All Praise is duly & surely to Him, Alone!!

n we are so powerless that we cannot memorize even the names of the different bones and nerves,completely !!

With such proof in front of him,how can anyone deny the existence of God!?!

Subhana'allah! Subhana'allah ! Subhana'allah!

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

Eid Mubarak! :)

2010-11-17T21:13:00.001+03:00

Eid Mubarak !! :)

Am away from home,yet again in Blore for this Eid-normal course ,I would have been a wee lil :( !!

But, for a change! :) :)

New dress-without which Eid isn't just eid! :)
Good time at my friend's place! :)
The early morning travel through Blore town! :)
The 'mallus' I met & someone telling, " I have met you somewhere" and likewise feeling ! :)
Description of my new dress to Sis n Mom! :)
Talking to GrandPa and hearing his lovely laughter! :)
The innumerable calls & messages! :)
& Yes, Learning to live each moment! :)

The only person who can make you happy is URSELF! :) - A friends advice recently!

Alhamdulilah! :)

All Praise be to the Almighty,for all His Bountiful blessings! :)

& Once again,

Till Next,

Fly High! :)

Cycle of Life !!

2010-11-16T21:45:00.002+03:00

My previous post reminded me of an incident :

Last year,during the final internal practical exams of Prosthodontics,I had a 70 year old patient-a complete denture patient......

Complete denture in simple words means the artifical set that old people wear.Fabrication of complete denture was our final year exercise for Prosthodontics,which was a truly messy and strenuous experience!!

Coming back to the exam, we have to complete one step of complete denture fabrication in a stipulated period of time on the basis of which we would be graded!

Recording the case history of the patients is a must before we start every case and so there I was,with butterflies in my stomach,all geared up and asking the patient for his occupation,address and family history and he narrates his tale........

" I have 4 sons.The first one is an engineer,studied in the same college,second one has done his MBA,third one finished his B.com and is into business and the youngest one is done with his graduation..

They are all in separate places well settled and quite happy with their lives.Very glad that they have done well in life......

Our house was always filled wid noise,fights and much racket.U can imagine with 4 boys.It's an eerie silence now.I wish I cud rewind to those days.Then I had complained about the noise,now I complain about the silence.....

What can I do? I cannot tell them to sit at home and be with me.It would be quite selfish of me.They too need to find their way out & look after their families!!

I never knew loneliness was a major part of post-retirement life!...... "

Rest of the exam was a blur for me....

A silent prayer for him....
& all those left alone!

Till Next,
Fly High ! :)

She was always their topmost priority !

2010-11-15T21:37:00.002+03:00

Her birth was the happiest day of their life
Her first step was their proudest moment
Her first word was like their own achievement

Leaving her alone at her kindergarten class for the first time;
left them in tears!

Her entry into school was yet another chapter in their life
The innumerable prizes won at school...
The welcome songs and dance...
The injured knee,the broken leg,the disturbed mind
They were there always!

Leaving home for college,they prayed heartfelt,
that no harm touches their lil one..
That college doesn't change their angel's ways..

Her graduation day,taking the Hippocrates oath
their eyes glistening with happiness,excitement and pride!

Early morning,wearing the white coat and running to the hospital,

yes,indeed their daughter has achieved her dreams &
they praised the Almighty!

On her wedding day,they prayed her better half will
love her more than they did!

The grandchildren lighted up their ailing minds
and brought noise in their house again!

She was always their topmost priority!

Though

She forgot to say a 'thank you' for the mobile phone & laptop

and the innumerable luxuries they provided her with

She inadvertently missed to mention them on her graduation speech

She settled down in another city so that she could live life on her own

She got busy with husband's office functions & kid's school play

She was helping patients ,day in and day out,but couldn't

read her dad's painful eyes

She didn't realize they were growing old,frail and lonely

Yet

She was always their topmost priority!

Till Next,
Fly High ! :)

The World I want.....

2010-11-14T22:02:00.004+03:00

The World I want is where kindness,compassion & peace are not just words,but action!

The World I want is where poverty,rape & murder are not action but just words in an old dusty dictionary!

The World I want is where oppression & concentration camps are a thing of the past!

The World I want is where freedom & summer camps can be afforded and enjoyed by every child alike!

Thw World I want is where terrorists don't kill 'innocent'
& where 'innocent' aren't labelled terrorists!

The World I want is where colour of skin doesn't matter but colour of heart does!

The World I want is where man distributes his money like honey bee share its honey!

The World I want is where green leaves increase but green eyed monsters decrease!

The World I want is where no stomach goes hungry,no family goes homeless and no child grows up without feeling loved!

The World I want is where every butterfly,peacock,and tiger get its rightful place under the sun!

The World I want is where U and I firmly know, that He is up there,taking care of us,no matter what!

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

Yipeeee.....

2010-10-26T08:29:00.002+03:00

....the previous one was my first post from mastory!!! :)

.....I prefer to call it Home!

2010-10-26T07:46:00.003+03:00

It has been 4 years,2 months that I have been staying in Bangalore!Some beautiful memories that I hope my mind is never erased of it,some so painful that my heart wrenches at the mere thought of it!!

Most of the memories are connected wid staying at 312,the place I have stayed for 3 years ,5 months and the very same place I will be vacating widin a few weeks!

Heart tinges !

The innumerable PG(paying guest) mates I had-Anu chechi,Rajitha chechi,Lachu chechi,Shahina di,Shahnaz di,Salma di,Jilmy chechi,Monu,Eti,Sujatha mam,Noble chechi,Risha di,Nazia di,Archana,Samina,Anupama di.....Read it as Dip.,BBA,MBA Students, Docs,Nurses,Dentist,Engineers,Teachers!! The assortment!The complete package!The different things I have learnt from all of them...May it be North Indian Recipies,words n phrases of various languages,about the customs & festivals of their places.The innumerable gossip sessions,serious discussions about life n religion, decision making time,shopping sprees,b'day celebrations & treats and much girl talk!!Wish I had clicked a pic of each of these occasions then!

I used to hear Assamese or Bengali or Marathi etc being spoken at such fast pace wondering if full stop wasn't in their vocabulary,then realising that when I speak Malayalam,they too would be finding it so very complicated!

The many room mates I had and how they used to see me struggling wid my books and how a cup of coffee was made for me to last through the night .No questions,no answers!

Face pack time,henna,feet in hot bubble :D,100 of moisturizer try out,sharing beauty tips-innumerable craziness u try out only when u r in a company of girls!!

If someone went out for shopping n how every stuff would be checked out,dissected,appreciated by everyone when she s back!! :)

Layout roaming for vegetables,utensils,masala powder,n at times fish,mutton n chicken-things which till then v had seen only our mothers do!!

First time trying of gulab jamun,rasgulla,cutlet,samoosa,sewai,karanjee and shared by everyone with a cup of coffee!Talking about cooking,its the first place where I tried it ever!!Now atleast I now how to put salt,chilli powder,turmeric powder while making a curry!Maybe my future hubby will not starve after all ! :D

The terrace-our place to star gaze,bird watch or maybe even spend a still moment while depression hits!

I loved it for the residential area it was in,the masjid next to our place -hearing the Azan was always a solace for me!The aunty I used to see always when I used to sit on the stairs while in Pre-maghrib Dhikr!

I have forever been surrounded by noise and people-be it at home(considering I have 3 siblings) or till now at hostel-home,now I am gonna shift to a single room PG.I have no clue if I can handle the silence!

And Life goes on......

Till Next,

View from outside our home

Fly high! :)

Maher Zain! :)

2010-08-23T21:39:00.003+03:00

Two tunes running in my head ,over and over....

Just came across this singer,loving his voice! :)

Insha'allah By Maher Zain

For the rest of my life ! :)

Is it too much to hope for?

:)

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

Veil of Modesty :)

2010-08-23T21:08:00.001+03:00

(This post was written maybe a month back ,though I am publishing it now!)

I serve!

2 days back I was travelling from Nilambur to CMR by bus.....my first-alone-travel-by-bus-in -Kerala....

I was getting the huge stares from every1.. maybe the huge trolley bag I had wid me or maybe the outsider look or so....dono....

I play!

Anyways I was just observing every1 around when I noticed the bus was filled wid gals ...off to skool,college n mayb work and the best part was they were all clad in Hijab ,beautiful salwars,matching scarves,shiny handbags..I wished I could take a pic n send to all the DAMN people who says Hijab is a sign of neanderthelism....to all who says Hijab prevents girls from achieveing academic /professional success......to all who says Hijab is followed by girls who have hitler fathers or husbands.....to all who says it doesnt look pretty!

I am in touch!

Most often Hijab is followed by girls ,because they themselves want to cover them up,not because their fathers or husbands or brothers are saying so.....

But because they want to....

fulfill their obligation to Allah Almighty!
protect themselves from lewd comments,stares,& unwanted attention!
uphold their dignity & respect n be modest!

No,wearing Hijab doesnot prevent a girl from achieving her status in society,rather it elevates her position.

No,wearing Hijab does not rob her of having fun with her friends,she can still have fun in a Halal way.

No,wearing Hijab does not make her ignorant of the technology around.

I study!

To make statistics speak :

According to one survey done by Shervani in U.P. the percentage of Muslim girls appearing for SSC examinations has increased. Not only that but the success rate of Muslim girls has jumped 19 times. That means Muslim girls are taking their studies much more seriously today than before 1990. This healthy trend seems to be persisting. Many Muslim girls are making it to the merit lists also.

According to 2001 census the female literacy of Muslims in Kerala was 85.5%

just quoting a few....

Today Hijab clad girls can be seen in all walks of life....in skools,in the corporate world,in hospitals,at restaurants,just about everywhere...

We are awakened! We will conquer!

Why should we be afraid when we have Allah Almighty with us?

THREE CHEERS to all my sisters!!

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

First post of this year!?!

2010-07-03T21:49:00.001+03:00

It has been like absolutely forever since I updated my blog..not that any1 reads this....but felt like updating this ,so here it is!!....

The first update on this blog was while I was in 2nd year.....n now I am here..just written my final year theory exams.....clinicals left...jus hoping wid all prayers to Almighty...that it goes fine....Insha'allah!

How much life has changed these past 4 years?! Away from home...in a new city...the number of people I have met....the experiences I am enriched with....the things I have learnt...Surely it has helped me mature n grow up!I would never have had this insight into 'life' had I stayed at home after my 12 th! But miss home everyday.....miss u umma, uppa .....everyday , every minute..... Rabirhamhuma Kama Rabbayani Sa'eera... My prayers always for u!!May Allah Almighty ease all your load,wipe all your worries n give u the BEST in this world n hereafter Akhira!! Ameen...

Talking about life here...I must surely mention the 'pangs of loneliness' that has crushed me at times!But Alhamdulilah.....I feel ,I have always been under Allah's love n protection! Maybe Umma 's prayer for me!Maybe that's what has helped me to overcome all the difficulties that I have been afflicted with.....A mom's prayer & a dad's strength!

I realize....never underestimate a MOM's prayer for her child! It's just very powerful....

I wonder what the rest of the year is gonna bring me....but whatever it is ,Thawakkalthul Ala Allah.....

Till my next episode! :D wonder when it will b ...

Fly high! :)

Eid ul Ad'ha...The Festival of Sacrifice

2009-11-27T21:28:00.001+03:00

The Heartiest Wishes! :)

Hope, Insha'allah,this is the last time I have to spend Eid alone!

Till Next,
Fly high! :)

....Maze!

2009-11-16T21:31:00.001+03:00

The Big City leaps forward...
never waiting for the slow travellers..
Truth isn't a word here..
It's all money,lust,brands & fame!!

For a person who stands against all this
is indeed termed an 'outcast'
Why should we always go with the flow?
Why should we dance to others tunes?
Why cant we make our own music??

She started seeing the fake face of the Metro from the auto driver,who greeted her at the Railway Station, charging her hundreds of rupees extra,by taking the longest route possible!

Then in the form of the landlord where she rented out a place,who doesn't bother if a tenant is screeching with pain or not ,but indeed needs the payment,within the exact day!A day later would mean extra fine.

She saw the ugly face of fake friendship in the plan of a room mate who tried to get emotionally attached to her,yet she dint realize that she was being utilized ,day in & day out-of money,of books ,of 'time' and was the target of a greater ' devious' intent.

Then in the form of fellow hostelite,who cut her vein to profess her undying love for her boyfriend.Does the blood split strengthen relationships!?! Rather doesn't it show an underlying insecure relationship?

The fake feeling rebounded all around her!In the way of 'vegetable seller' who sold everything for Rs.5 extra from the norm!

She was shocked by the friend,who glared at her with green eyes, every time she got professionally awarded or recognized!

In the style of the Receptionist at College,who charged her under the table for every certificate that had to be signed by a Higher Authority.

Yet....

She loved the big city!

For it's zest and zeal...
For its multi ethnic crowd...
For its breezy mornings..
For its beautiful evenings...
For its mild winter showers...
For its beautiful gardens!!

Till Next,

Fly High!! :)

Calls to The One Above!

2009-11-09T10:57:00.002+03:00

Oh Allah, Help me in my QUEST...

Quest for knowledge,that is beneficial
in this wold & in the Hereafter Akhira
Quest for greater Iman & Ihsan
Quest for the meaning of my life
Quest for my purpose
Quest for stability and strength
Quest for love
Quest for joy & happiness

Oh Allah,when adversity strikes me
Help me remember that YOU donot burden
a soul beyond that which it cannot bear
& to believe wholeheartedly,'Tawakkalthul Ala-lla"

Oh Allah,when You bless me with
personal & professional success
Help me stand firmly on the ground
and to say 'Alhamdulilah' always

Oh Allah,when the shimmering lights
of 'Dunya' glare me away from You
Help me recall that this indeed is ephemeral
and that I am just a traveler here

Oh Allah,everyday when I learn
about the Human Body
Help me retrospect on Your Power
and the Powerless beings,we are

Oh Allah,when I am surrounded
with the people I love-family & friends
Help me 'call to mind' that
I am Blessed,surely

Oh Allah ,increase my Taqwa
Help me be closer to YOU
Associate me with people who will

guide me in the Right Path

.....Spotless Days! :)

2009-11-07T17:46:00.005+03:00

Want to go back to a TIME when...

monthly tests,term exams and finals were like the end of the world
an A+ placed you on top of the world
every festival meant the entire family would be around to celebrate
shopping for Eid was a family event
school was a place, loved and hated to go
you waited for the lift bell to go 'ting' and then the'juggling of the key' sound ,outside home signifying that dad is coming back from work and he most often would have a chocolate to brighten up your day
you wear the new dress & U go to Daddy and he says, ' U are looking absolutely amazing!' & u feel on top of the world,again
Tuesdays were a much awaited day coz Young Times came on Tuesday.
the entire family comes for 'Honor's Roll' function at school & U were one of the recipient & yet again u feel on top of the world
weekends meant ,going to Wakrah,to meet Aunt ,Uncle,Molutty,Samu and Salu
going to school on thursday was a happy event,coz Dad would come to pick up from school and U go could go back in the AC car (compared to the rickety bus in the hot sun) and he would often have goodies in the car
friendship meant wearing the same 'heart-shaped' pendant
buying a new set of 'Faber Castell' color pencils gave the sense-of-ownership-of-literal -treasure
'Heidi' was the most favourite cartoon
getting the 'class-leader' badge was a thing of 'honour' indeed
Summer vacation was eagerly awaited so as to get back to India for hols and meet all the extended relatives,cousins and family
2 new pair of dress was absolutely necessary before going for hols,one to wear while going & other while coming back & Mom would say,'it's as though the pilot wont allow U in flite widout a new dress!'

.....a TIME of carefree days,innocence and love!!

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

A Round of Applause!! :)

2009-10-30T11:31:00.008+03:00

Congrats J, for ur Amazing score in SAT....am shoo proud of u ,baby bro!! :)

May Allah Almighty help u to scale greater heights of glory n success!!

May U reach the 'altitude' that u have always dreamt of! n frankly I have never met any one else, who has a more persistent dream since childhood, than U!! :)

Congrats S,for the fixing of ur Marriage Date!

Waiting to see U as the Beautiful Dulhan ,all shy n decked up ,on UR day!! :)

May Allah Bless U both wid Faith,Happiness n Success ,every minute of ur life! :)

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

(Pics from http://amuslimwife.blogspot.com/)

New Look!!

2009-10-29T11:54:00.004+03:00

Jus changed my template! :)

The pink flowers are so not me!!! This is more like it!! :)

But

Where is my sunshine? :) :)

Till Next,
Fly high! :)

Name,fame & finally Shame!

2009-10-29T10:24:00.005+03:00

I grew up watching almost every single Grand Slam match!Absolutely adored every tennis star!

Loved Agassi n his style of play!His effective strokes and and 'rock star' image.

But today's headlines shocked me :

" I took drugs in 1997 : Agassi "

The report says he had taken crystal meth and was helped by his drug user assistand,slim

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/sports/tennis/top-stories/Agassi-admits-taking-drugs-and-lying-to-ATP/articleshow/5173477.cms

Why do we always looks for shortcuts for success??

A disappointing news for his millions fans ,the world over....

A blow to his record slam titles......

Yet again,another drug history in tennis ,after the much controversial 'Hingis dope test positive'!!....

Till next,
Fly High! :)

Profound thoughts! :D

2009-10-27T11:18:00.003+03:00

Often I come here when i am either in 'deepest pit' mood or when I am just exuberantly happy!!..It 's neither rite now ,but jus felt like updating my blog !

First things first, in final year now!! Alhamdulilah for everything!! :) Came in 2nd in colg this time! :) All my success,only due to Lord's bountiful blessing( in spite of the lazy person I am!) All my success, for my dearest Uppa! I kno u will never read this ,neither will I ever say such things directly,U r my biggest Inspiration n strength! n Momma....All ur prayers!Widout it v can never achieve anything!!

Now treating patients almost everyday, I realize the big responsibility that my profession puts on me!To not just 'set ' the problem rite,but in deed to be the patients trusted confidante!I will tell U, there is no feeling like,helping a person resolve his pain or strengthen his confidence by improving his looks!The smile of gratitude,from a patient, after a job well done,thats pretty much enough for 'making my day'!

Waiting to enter the Pedodontics Dept., for I love kids! Bt ,bt...hate being the one targeted there! That's fine anyways!God is there to help me out!

One thing, I so hate.....Often in college,many people look down upon me ,something like 'oh u cannot do this' or 'oh u r inefficient' kinda attitude! That hurts me to the core.... I wonder why people walk around wid such narrow minded attitude!Is it coz I wear an extra Hijab over my head?But What does my scarf have to do with my abilities?Is being modest no longer considered' right' ??
But time and again,Alhamdulilah,due to Almighty's grace ,I have tried/been able to prove them wrong!Bt still........

Jus a day ago, One of my cozins marriage almost got Fixed! Masha'allah!! Fingers crossed,tht everything will b settled soon, Insha'allah!! V grew up together,considering v have only 6 months difference between us! :) n now its as though ,v r all growing up and too fast! :)May Allah Bless U wid the Best ,dear! Love u lots! :) For all the times,v have talked ,lafed n cried together! :) u people are some of my bestest memories of childhood!

Last time I updated my blog, was very very very upset over a situation n now it looks like , just another' one of those problems'! :) Lol, Indeed Time is the best healing factor!

Allah, plz help me out n give me the strength to face this all! I have none other than U to turn to! :)

Till Next,
Fly high! :)

2009-09-21T14:37:00.002+03:00

The Pain is devouring me...inch by inch...piece by piece!!

Lord ,Help me out!!

YOU are the ONLY ONE whom I can turn to!!

Spill n Splash! :)

2009-04-22T17:24:00.006+03:00

RAIN!!....The shower of water from ABOVE has always Amazed ME!!

Having been grown up in a desert,it wasn't always tht I get to experience these downpours!Except occasionally when there was a drizzle or so!I loved putting my hands out n getting it wet(tht was the maximum mom wud allow us to get wet!)

Now being in India n experiencing the rain every now and then,it still hasn't stopped enticing me!!

The first rain n the wet mud smell!!Ther's nothing like it,seriously!! :)

Will never forget the dash to the local supermarket to get some goodies at 9:30 in the nite,when it was raining cats n dogs,with the thunder and lightning as our companions! :)

Standing out of our hostel n bird-watching in the rain! ;)tht's also sure FUN! :P

Walking as slow as possible,when all the others were running for a cover at whom I feel like screaming,"It's OK!!There is no harm in getting wet!Just take it Eazy!!" :) {or is it of their age??Am I too gonna do the same thing once I join the workforce?}

The tiny droplets splattering on the face are indeed rejuvenating! They just wash away all the pain,for that lil while! :)

The small muddy puddles formed,I still play in it! :)

N the best is saved up for the END!!

The glistening leaves,the fresh look,the clear skies n maybe,just maybe ...if v r lucky..a shiny cute rainbow peeking!! :)

[The pic: View from my hostel front door after today's shower! :)}

Till Next,
Fly high!! :)

The Cherub's lovable ways! :)

2009-02-08T23:01:00.005+03:00

For getting the facts,right...there is something with me n TRAVELING!!Either the flight is delayed or canceled or there is a turbulence during flight!!If none of this is there,then my luggage wouldn't have reached with me! :D

So here I was,Mid term hols from college n all set to go HOME!!Where I consider home is the place I grew up n has some wonderful memories !DOHA!(merely just hearing the name doha makes me smile while I am in Blore:) )All ready n packed n was about to leave from hostel when Dad rings me up n says that he got a call from Emirates,saying my evening flite frm blore to Dubai is canceled !! :( :( I was so DAMN irritated,more so ,the next day there was this huge party at home n I sooo wanted to be a part of IT!

n finally I settle for an early morning flite to dubai n thereafter a connecting flite to doha!!

The 1st flite s fine until we are just about to land,when the announcements come there is a heavy congestion at the DXB airport owing to the cold weather conditions there n there we were flying at the same altitude for around 20 minutes!! I imagined it to be a ride ,just circling n circling circling!!

Finally I get in to the airport at 8:10 AM local time!!My next flite is at 8:30AM!!HAD to go thru security check n luggage screening in a jiffy!!Crossed people in queue(after gettin some beautiful stares from them) n finally reached my departure gate at 8:25 to realize the 2 nd flite has been delayed by almost an hour!!

Sheesh!! Shouldn't have wasted my calories ,running all the way(considering the airport is a lil too BIG,for normal two-legged beings! :D )n should have had a bite at the duty free!!Well,well well....wht to do!!

There I was sitting all hungry,dejected,damn sleepy n tired when I notice this angelic kid,maybe about 4 or 5 years old!She was travelling with her(i s'ppose!)mother, n granparents!!She was singing n dancing n in short a nice lil entertainment to those 'exasperated-cos-of-the-delays' passengers,including me!I was lost in her world!!Her shweet lil songs wid her innocent laughter just mesmerized every1 there!

She started singing another song(not in a language I could recognize.Probably they were from the Far-East)and her grandfather makes her to stand in Attention position with her hands on the sides n straight n I realize maybe it's either a devotional song or their National Anthem!The whole audience listened with rapt attention,most of them wid a smile!After finishing her song,she gives a BOW turning in all the four directions with her small head almost touching the floor!One hand placed in front and the other behind!

A baby cried,nearby!A European family,I suppose!What the 4 year old angel does amazes me!!She goes to her mom,takes a chocolate n a cute teddy from her mom's bag n comes n offers to the wailing baby!! :) LOVE at its purest forms! :) :) :) There was just no colour or country or whatsoever difference here!Just a moment of goodness,inborn! :)

Will we,as adults,do that?Give our most prized possession to someone who is in distress so as to bring a smile.Do we lose our benevolence as age advances??Is HUMANENESS inversely proportional to a man's age?

Boarding the second flite,I glanced at her again!

God Bless u,Lil one!! :) :) :)

U made me smile,angel! :)

Till next,
Fly high!! :) :)

Ring in the NEW!!

2008-12-31T19:56:00.004+03:00

Some of my best moments of 2008!!.....

Sis's Marriage! :)

Wishing my dearest Sis the Very BEST.......

Hoping that u find happiness n joy in every moment to come!!

May all the tears of ur yesterdays be erased by the smiles of today n laughter of tomorrow!

Keep Smiling!!

The JOY at my home!

Topping College! :) tht was sure surprising!!

Meeting some old friends!! :)

New Born Baby at home!

New Friends!

Adventures during travels to doha n kerala!

HOPING THE NEW YEAR BRINGS BRIGHTER MOMENTS TO ALL!! :)

Till next,
Fly High!! :)

Nov Highs! :)

2008-11-30T19:36:00.004+03:00

Basically,I am scribbling this so tht november doesnt go wid out a post! :)

The only difference about novemeber was,I worked on my first patient.......!!A 11 year old kid.....from one of the slums nearby....his was a pretty easy,uncomplicated case...thank God !!coz ....yeah I had butterflies in my stomach!.....its getting better of late,though....the butterflies part!!

n I realize its my first step of the professional-ride!! :) All s in the Hands of Almighty! :)

N a line from one of the medical thrillers by Robin Cook ,about practice, They range from so sublimely joyous to so sublimely sad,yet so uniquely human!

n Waiting for Sport's day,College day,Eid n most of all Dec 21,Insha'allah!!...

Till Next,
Fly High!!

Randomness Indeed!

2008-10-08T18:23:00.003+03:00

hey!! i jus wanna type all tht have been happening!! :)

my results did come but a week after the rest of the results came!mine were withheld due to some technical error in the university!n it came a week later!!wht a week it was!?!but wen it came I was jumping,shrieking n screaming! :)Alhamdulilah,it went gud!

some thing tht i have been prayin for sooooo long jus became so ,2 days back!!! n I am on top of the mooonnn!!

3rd year started n it is goin in full swing !!clinicals n discussions!! :) :(

met an old skool fren last week n man wasn't i overjoyed!!so much of old talk caught up on!!n it was nice hear her blabbber n blabber n blabber!

Eid came n went!n again it was me being al aloone in this big city!missed my family n missed all those close to me!!but I suppose v gotta b in situations like this to 'realize' our loved ones n gud times wid dem!!

An earlier post I had prayed wish I get a roomie to fast along wid me!!n WOW!! i got a new rooomieee!!jus as I wished!! lol!! :)

One thing I cannot stand is liars n fakers.....n life mostly puts me in situations wid such people....y??

At times,I jus wanna finish wid all this,wid my course n college n run back home n other times wen I think of it,I don want it to End!I dont want to enter the next phase -job hunting-!!I want to continue this carefree days!!

Just some gibberish post.....all tht came to my mind...

Till next,
Fly high!!

2008-09-10T18:28:00.003+03:00

Its gud bye time n results time for me!What a combination!!

G'd bye ,home

2nd year results abt 2 come...........aaah!

Till next,
Fly High! :)

Seconds,seconds n just seconds!

2008-09-09T15:47:00.005+03:00

The timings of the different runners of the 100 m dash at the Beijing Olympics just left me wonder struck ,when thought abt!

The Gold Medalist and the Track fields new hero ,Usain Bolt of Jamaica,came running the 100 m at just 9.69 seconds...

The Silver Medalist,Richard Thompson,came in at 9.89 seconds,two-tenths of a second behind and loss of an olympic gold medal!

The Bronze medalist at 9.91 ....that is 0.02 seconds behind and loss of the silver medal!

Fourth runner came in 9.93 seconds ,again the same difference in seconds!

So,its basically a matter of miniscule of seconds whether your name is in obscurity or whether u clinch the coveted medals n record!This is surely 'competition' in the highest form seen!

Most of these athletes train day in and day out ,toil n moil for 4 years ,only at times to lose the medal coz of being tenth s of a SECOND behind!

N most of the time,unfortunately,we fail to recognize this,that its just a matter of time n minutes n seconds ,that makes a difference!!

Smile on!

Till next,
Fly high! :)

Ahlan,Shahru Ramadan!

2008-09-01T15:53:00.008+03:00

The Muslim Holy Month of Ramadan has knocked our doors!...

Today is the first day of fasting in the Middle East and in India(i am not sure about other places!)

It is the ninth month of the Islamic calendar and fasting is one of the Five Pillars of Islam...

It is a time for prayers,spiritual reflection and reformation,doing good deeds,alms and spending time wid one's family and friends...

The best I remember about Ramadan during my childhood is the Ifthar(breaking-fast) parties at family ,friends and our community clubs and the Taraweeh and Qiyam ul lail prayers at our local mosque!As a child,I remember how I used to be woken up for the pre-dawn meal(Suhoor)!Used to eat the meal...half sleepy! Alhamdulilah(All Praise be to Allah!), I get to be at my home for this years Ramadan,though for a few days,before I go back to college and hostel!

Having been brought up in the Middle East, I have grown up seeing the Ramadan spirit,aura,feeling around, during the season but now being in one of the metros of India,I miss the same 'spirit'around!but surely Ramadan isn't in the spirit around but in the spirit and feeling within oneself!

The special delicacies at home,for Ifthar, prepared by Momma,Cutlets,Samoosas,Payampori(banana fry) and innumerable other dishes is gonna be missed by me once I go back!Meanwhile lemme enjoy them while I am here! :)

Arranging them at our dining table,waiting for the Maghrib Adhan(Sunset Call to Prayer),hearing the call to prayer, and then eating dates&drinking water/juice to quench our thirst....it is surely a blissful feeling!At the time of breaking fast,no prayer is left unheard!...

But then ,the thought goes to the Millions of people around the globe without one square meal a day!When will their "Maghribb Adhan" come?If fasting 30 days a year considered tough by some people(May Allah strengthen their Iman-faith),how do these folks survive?Ezp the worse affected being children,below 10 years of age!
Lets reconsider our luck,in having a family to hang on,food to live on, n faith to grow on and praise God Almighty for His bountiful blessings!

May The Almighty accept our Fasts,prayers n good deeds!

May The Almighty help sisters n brothers in distress,the world over!

Ameen!

( n I seriously hope I get a hostel mate,after I go back,to fast along with me!So that I am not alone for Suhoor and Ifthar and Taraweeh!)

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

Yours lovingly,

2008-08-27T22:16:00.002+03:00

Going thru my room at home n trying to clear up the junk of many yester years,I cam upon loads n loads of letters!Cleaning was stopped in between n rest of the time went in reading them!Boy,wasn't I glad!Thr were tonnes frm my granparents, frm back home in India,cozins,many frm my skool frens who have left the country,many I myself have written as replies but have never posted! :)

Grandparents...the ever epitome of love!How rightly it is said,........Every generation revolts against its fathers and makes friends with its grandfathers. Being far away from them n visiting them only once a year ,for every summer, I did miss out the 'fun' most of the kids have,but they regularly send us letters enquiring about studies,health n advices n most of all ...their love n prayers,widout which we wouldn't have reached whr v r n for all the things yet to come!!I have treasured them n reading it again does bring a tear always!

From my cozins.innumerable uncles n aunts....I used to love the ones ezp frm lil cozins..jus learning to put all the words tog....thr was love n care written all over,widout them knowing!Now we r all in different walks of life,in different places n countries(at times not recognizing each others while once in a blue moon v meet up) n letters have obviously dwindled among us all!Though E-mail/MSN/Yahoo/Gtalk n other innumerable messengers n Orkut/Facebook have come up.....keeping in touch is a pretty rare phenomenon!

One of my closest frens while in primary skool relocated to a different continent while in 5 th grade n believe me v kept in touch for years thru letters!(yeah ,yeah ,yeah handwritten letters!)Frankly I dono whether I'll ever take the effort,now, to keep in touch wid any1 thru letters!Reading thru her letters,made me think about those times....The much awaited P.E class,Welcome Songs at Annual Day(in which v both h ad taken part!),Badminton games at our colony(she was an awesome badminton player ) n many more memories which time was slowly erasing from my system!(In one of dem I have written to her...plz dont send typed letters...plz write in ur own handwriting!Gosh!)Lost in touch wid her while I moved back to India for my college but a few months back ,caught her again on Facebook!so now its facebook posting!but thats nothing compared to those oldddd letters!

My Best Fren,Nins,shifted to India after 10th n after her first term in her new skool,she send me a letter regarding each n everything in her skool.....n guess how many pages it was?!?...116!!116 letter Pad Pages!Boy!My dad was bawled over wen he saw the 2 extremely thick envelopes at his mailbox! :D ....Readin it was the best part,It was like a calendar of events!Still read thru wenever I come home n get reminded of those lovely days!!(lemme take this chance to say a big THANKU....if ever u come across this blog or not..Thanku for everything,for being bestest of ma freinds,for being in touch though v have been in separate places for 5 yrs now,for lightening my spirits before those bloody exams,for being wid me thru all down times n for always ringing me up at the MOST APPROPRIATE of times!Not every1 ll have a best fren like u,dear...!)

n yet there were many letters,old family frens,sis' frens n the likes...........

I wonder,does any letter come to our mailbox now,besides the occasional courier or post or wedding invitation!

Orkut scraps,Facebook posts n many more social networking sites r the 'in' thing now....but do they really replace the letters,in one's own handwritings??Is it the same feeling?

Till Next,
Fly High! :)

Another lifetime!!

2008-08-25T13:38:00.001+03:00

I just came across the video 'The Last Lecture:Achieving your childhood dreams" by Carnegie Mellon Professor,Dr. Randy Pausch,which incidentally became his last lecture before he left for his eternal abode on July 25,2008,after fighting a battle wid pancretic cancer.

The video makes one wonder about his amazing spirit though he knew cells in his body were going haywire,his ability to laugh inspite,his logical reasoning ,his innate academia,...

In the presentation,he lists down his childhood dreams and how he have realized them and about enabling others dreams!.....some of his dreams

being in zero gravity
to play in NFL
to be an Imagineer in Disney
to author an article in World Book Encyclopeadia ..n so on...

(Wow!I never knew people would have such specific dreams of childhood!Some people are jus born to make it big, I s'ppose)
That set me thinking...to jot down my childhood dreams! :)

To become a neurosurgeon,after reading about Dr Ben Carson,the famous neurosurgeon(though it is not my chosen line of profession now... I am a dentist in training,Insha'allah...I am glad I had a dream so ! ) :)

To be a Journalist,Archaeologist,Astronaut or Mathematics Teacher,at some point or other! :) (haha even writing about it makes me smile!Its nice to b a kid n dream ,wht am I gonna b! )

To study in a college which has a huge campus,a town within! (wow!lord! Thank God for making ths come true!) :)

To be like my dad (dono if I ll ever reach thr....He is my huge Role model!) :)
To write stories like Famous Five,Secret Seven (by Enid Blyton),for kids,bcoz I grew up reading n loving 'em! :)
To work with WHO/UNICEF....work in Africa (hehe...!! ) :)

To go skiing!especially after watching movies in which kids play wid snow n ice ...... :)

To play tennis n b like Pete Sampras,Steffi Graf n Martina Hingis!(Woah!!....some dreams!I used to adore those stars as a kid n love the game,but have never tried it till date! ) :)

Childhood.....jus wish it could come back!!Its innocence,joy,laughter,pranks,ice creams,chocolates,hugs, n dreams!! Its a period like NO other!

Till next!
Fly high! :)

Sir, Who am I?!?

2008-08-22T19:19:00.002+03:00

Imagine waking up one day,not being able to figure out who v r,not knowing whr v are or even who our families r!

This is the case of 24 million people affected world wide wid Alzheimer's and senile dementia.

Alzheimer’s disease, brain disease, is a neuro-degenerative disorder which causes a gradual deterioration of permanent nerve cells, causing senile dementia.
The disease leads to an impact on the daily lives of patients: it is accompanied by a gradual deterioration of events leading intellectual, psychological and behavioural disorders leading to a loss of autonomy.

Much have been circulated in the media regarding these neuro-degenerative disorders ,......A Beautiful Mind(movie and the book), U me aur hum(a hindi movie) ..to name a few!I dint realise the full implications of this disease until I saw a loved one struggling wid it!

I grew up knewing her as an-all efficient,pious n kind hearted lady who gave her cent percent to her family,until IT struck her.The minute difficulties of not being able to read the time,forgetting the no of times she had done her mandatory 5 times prayers,initially, changed to not being able to recognize her own sons or not being able to say her own name,forgettin the recent incidents but still recalling situations and stories heard 25 years ago.

All through the stages of the disease,her faith in GOD was intact,remembering every prayer,every dua she learnt as a child.

God had blessed her with an amazing family-a pillar of strength, her husband, and 7 supporting children and innumerable grandkids who made sure that she would never realise her weakness,who enveloped her with all the love and care they could,who prayed for her every minute and who were there by her bedside till she breathed her last.

Medical science suggests many drugs like Donepezil,Rivastigmine,Minocycline and so on as medication for the disease(ther r no drugs as of now to cure the illness,they only slow down the disease) but the best treatment for this cognitive function declining disease is the drug of LOVE and SUPPORT from family and loved ones.No medication can surpass tht.The 24 million people affected are not so lucky, as a percentage of them are left in old-age homes and Alzheimer's rehabilitation centres by their own sons.These 'homes' are made of stone bricks and money buying materials,not of care,love and ties so essential for the patient.

A silent prayer for the millions affected.........

A prayer everyday,for her..

(ref:wikipedia n my physio,pharmac professors)

Till next,
Fly high! :)

Un-realised Metamorphosis!

2008-08-22T17:55:00.001+03:00

The last time I opened the blog was 6 months ago.......!!6 mnths...how time flies!!

I remember the New Year's eve.....was on the terrace of my hostel...enjoying the fireworks.....and now its almost the 9th month now!2008....it has taught me lots!to grow up from a care-free gal to a matured-decision taking,voicing-opinions lady,I should say!:P

(from)The last time I posted the blog,.......

I was in the mid of my second year..now am done wid my year end exams! :)

I didnot know Responsibility begins wid a big capital, letter R! :)

I hadn't realized abt the fragility of life!

I hadn't thought about the truth called death!

I used to think life would go on as we decide/want,realising now tht IT has its own plans n its always have been for the good!

I used to be less-listening!

I knew lesser number of people than now!

I understand now tht adversities bring loved ones closer,families nearer!

I have learnt to look at every situation from a different angle,every cloud does have its silver lining,only tht we tend to overlook it!

I have tried out some diet plans, n for the first ever time in the recorded history of my life I have reduced the intake of sweets!!

I have learnt tooth preparation and amalgam restoration a lil better!

I share a better rapport wid my friends n professors than ever!

n changes n changes!

n I have realised CHANGE is surely one of the PERMANENT aspect of life!

till next(mayb another 6 months!:)
fly high! :)

Adios ,home!!

2008-02-12T16:12:00.001+03:00

Well,it's goodbye time for me!I am leaving home today!! :(

Goodbyes !! I have always hated it! n frankly speaking,I never say a proper goodbye to the people close to me...I just cannot!

A few summers ago,while I was coming back from my grandparent's place, I dint say a proper bye n salaam to my grandma.Regret it to this day!coz I never got another chance to!

'Where we love is home-home that our feet may leave,but never our hearts!"-Oliver Wendell Holmes,Sr

How true!! :)

But another positive aspect about Goodbyes,they always mean a fresh start to a new beginning! :)Yeah ,I am looking forward to the second half of my second year!Since the externals are just another 5 to 6 months away,this would mean more of tooth carving,setting,cavity preparation n more of dental antics! :)

I am looking forward to being with my friends again!To start our daily routine of getting up at the last minute but still making it on time for the 8' O clock class,hunting for food since our mess has been off for the past 2 months n we just cannot find out another mess satisfying our 'mallu' tastebuds,trying to catch up on all the latest movies together,playing with wax to make occlusion rim(practical work again!)at 12 in the night n calling up each other to scream,"What the hell!?!I just cannot get this right!!To the person who made wax,alginate,plaster,impression compound n wht not!?!..Aaaaaaaaargh!!"

Lemme go catch up on my sleep!!Have got a long flight with a 5 hours transit in between!Wonder what I am gonna do then!Hope I have a talkative cum chatterbox co-passenger! :) I always wish for this.....n yeah my travels have always been exciting! :)

Till next,
Fly high!! :)

Bismillahi Rahmani Raheem....

2008-02-12T00:11:00.000+03:00

In the Name of God,the most Beneficent,the most Merciful!

Yeah.....let that be my first words in this blogosphere!

mmm...I wanted to be in this blogging world for some time now and the person who introduced me on to this ,my sis!:) Have always been the most happiest when I am deep down in thought with a pen in my hand...but that has suffered a serious blow with a change-of-environment,a hectic course to handle n good old laziness factor!Hope the blogging world gives me enough reason to start it all over again especially overcome the 'inertia' factor!

The ramblings of a jobless stargazer...
Ramblings....because this is most probably gonna be incoherent cum unconnected talk of a normal teenager!This might as well be the normal jotting down I 'used to do ' in my diary!

Jobless....mainly bcoz I have been jobless for the past 18 days (mid term break from college)!n yeah today is actually my last day at home n I have been wanting to write my post since the first day I reached here.Well, just got time only today!!(Read it as 'last-minuter! )......does that make any sense?? Jobless...n got time only today!! :)

Stargazer.......I am a 24/7 dreamer!I don't exactly have an answer when people ask me 'What do u dream about?'....Seriously don't!!Mostly bcoz it isn't one thought or one emotion..it is a bucketful of them!

n the reason for smileysmilez...
maybe coz I love this Emoticon! :)
maybe coz I am a Dental student....n the usual fate of dental students /line among them is 'Sacrifice one's own smile so as to beautify/better the publics smile'! :)
maybe coz I was called smiley central by some friends back in school! :)

Actually it was a spontaneous thing..I just typed in what came to my head when they said to give in the URL!:)

As for a lil intro.....I am a 2nd year college going student ,doing my Bachelor of Dental Surgery(B.D.S)program.I adore my sweet family which includes my mom,dad,an elder sis,two younger bros.Every decision I make,every path I choose is with them in my mind.They mean the world to me!How do one go on in life without 'family-not-by-birth-but-by-choice-or-circumstance'.......friends?Yeah ..I too have my bundle...the childhood bunch..the school group..the college gang!Cannot place one above the other!

Thats all...as of now!
Fly high!